When a loved one goes to prison, their family serves time too. The emotional, financial, and social strain does not end when they are released. It just changes.
For families, reentry brings a mix of hope and fear. You want to support them, but you may not know how. At the same time, you may be struggling with your own emotions, financial challenges, or relationships affected by incarceration.
This page is here to help.
1. How Families Can Support a Loved One After Prison
Reentry is harder than most people expect. Even the most determined person will face rejection, isolation, and frustration while trying to rebuild their life. Having family support can make all the difference, but that support needs to be balanced, healthy, and realistic.
Emotional Support: What They Need Most
- Listen more than you advise. They already feel like the world is against them. Sometimes, what they need most is to be heard.
- Understand their frustration. Reentry is not just about getting a job. It is about rebuilding confidence after rejection, adjusting to changed relationships, and learning to function in a world that moved on without them.
- Let them be honest about their struggles. Do not dismiss their emotions, even if you do not fully understand them.
What NOT to say:
🚫 “Well, you made your choices.” (They already know that. This does not help.)
🚫 “Why is this so hard? Just get a job.” (Many employers will not even consider them. It is not that simple.)
🚫 “You should be grateful you are free.” (Freedom without stability can be terrifying.)
Setting Boundaries: Helping Without Enabling
- Encouragement does not mean blind support. If they are making good choices, stand by them. If they are slipping into old habits, set clear boundaries.
- Financial help should have a plan. If you help with money, make sure it is for specific goals like transportation to work, job training, or rent deposits.
- Do not let guilt control you. If they struggle, it is not always your job to fix it. Offer guidance, but let them take responsibility for their own path.
Helping with Jobs & Housing: When & How to Step In
- Job searching is frustrating. Offer to help find fair-chance employers, edit resumes, or do practice interviews.
- If they need housing, set expectations. If they are staying with you, be clear about house rules, contributions, and long-term plans.
- Help with small wins. Offer rides to interviews, look into local job programs, or connect them with someone in your network. Even small acts of support make a difference.
Navigating the Emotional Impact on Kids
- Be honest, but age-appropriate. Children often feel confused, angry, or even ashamed when a parent has been in prison.
- Do not ignore their emotions. Let them talk about their fears, their anger, or their sadness without shutting them down.
- Encourage healthy reconnection. If the returning parent wants to rebuild their relationship, help create a safe space for that to happen.
2. Support Available for Families
Families of incarcerated and formerly incarcerated individuals often struggle in silence. But help exists. Whether it is emotional support, financial aid, or legal assistance, you do not have to go through this alone.
Financial Aid & Legal Help for Families
💰 The National Resource Center on Children and Families of the Incarcerated – Resources for children with incarcerated parents.
💰 Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF) – Cash assistance for families in financial hardship.
💰 SNAP (Food Assistance) – Food benefits for families struggling after incarceration.
Emotional Support & Counseling
💬 Prison Fellowship – Faith-based programs for families of incarcerated individuals.
💬 Families Against Mandatory Minimums (FAMM) – Advocacy and support for families affected by long sentences.
💬 AFOI (Assisting Families of Inmates) – Support groups for families dealing with reentry challenges.
Community & Peer Networks
👥 Essie Justice Group – A national network for women with incarcerated loved ones.
👥 Children of Incarcerated Parents (Sesame Street Initiative) – Resources for helping young children understand incarceration.
👥 211 – A hotline that connects families with local support programs.
Final Thoughts
We understand the emotional toll that reentry takes on both sides. No one walks out of prison unchanged. The person coming home is not the same as the one who went away.
Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.
For families, there may be grief for the time lost, anger for the choices made, or uncertainty about what happens next. For those returning, there may be shame, fear, or the heavy weight of proving they deserve a second chance.
But one thing is certain. They do not need to be reminded of their mistakes. They carry them every day. What they need is a chance to be seen for who they are now, not who they were then.
Do not close the door. If they want to talk about it, lend them your ear. Listen without judgment. Let them be honest about what they are feeling, because moving forward does not happen in silence.
And for those coming home, talk. It helps. Find the people who will hear you without reminding you of everything you already know. It may take time, but trust and love can still exist on both sides.
That trust can be the difference between another sleepless night and waking up with a little more self-confidence, a little more hope, and a future that no longer feels impossible.